Tuesday, January 5, 2021

Sanctuary

 This is the place where I retreat. Retreat from the needs of the others I love and live with. Dave and the pups. Why would I need a retreat from them? Because  they depend on me, to do everything, and sometimes I run out of patience. Or I just need some alone time. Our older dog Chumley, will stand in the open door and look at me, waiting to be invited in. Irresistable. So he comes in and looks out the window quietly for a while, soon to be followed by Tony the other rascal and they begin to bark at every car that passes by. I am forced to lower the shades, or shoo them out and close the door. They cry. I open. Arrgh.
This was Dave's room, as mentioned in a previous post. But he rarely used it, other than a dumping ground and I just had to requisition it for my own use. At first I felt guilty, but while I was trying to nap here yesterday, he crept in and banged around with his guitars and tools and of course could not find what he needed and I had to wake up (not that I had fallen asleep yet) and tell him where to look. This was minutes after the dogs had finally settled down on the bed, after jumping all over me, pre-nap. Some sanctuary.
 I brought my knitting here, to keep the living room clutter down to a minimum, and it is perfect. Bright windows, and a good lamp for detail next to me. I have my laptop where I can listen to podcasts, keep abreast of the news and email or online shop when necessary. I am request knitting a poncho, based on the last shawl I made and it is going along swimmingly. My vista is of the busy street, reminiscent of when we lived in Cary IL on Main Street. Adjacent is the nice long non-busy dog walking street, Pennywood, which has one jogger every couple of days to really annoy our dogs. Just about everyone in this area have dogs and many walk them by our house. Lots of larger pooches, but the occasional fluff ball is evident. 
It is garbage day here today, and you can see what compliant citizens we have. Except for me, who forgot to bring out our bin last night and missed the early pick up today. Must I do everything? I'll have some cheese with this whine.
All in all it is pretty much just what the shrink called for, if I had one. So I am sharing all this with you because we women sometimes forget that we have to take care of our own needs too. And I needed this quiet spot. It is not selfish. It is self preservation. 
Zoom zoom.
Or murder prevention. You choose. 










13 comments:

  1. OMGosh.... a private space for self is so important! It should be called the "no guilt zone". I always wanted a sign to hang that said, "I don't do: How 'bout, When ya gonna and Why dont'cha" Your neighborhood pictures look like it is a nice area to be in. Just stop and breathe quite often and know you have a lot of support out here. FF's = Forever Fans!!!

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  2. I am quarantining with four others; my retired spouse, my daughter, her husband who works from home, and their four year old. I’m the only extrovert. And there are also three cats. Luckily, we live in a big space, but even this extrovert can get overwhelmed..

    Yesterday, I got so crabby that I had to give myself a timeout. Two hours, alone, was just what I needed.

    I am so glad you can claim a space. If it prevents murder, it is well worth it!

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  3. Good for you...no guilt required! We all need a murder prevention sanctuary!

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  4. Is it our lot to always feel guilty.... I think so at times.... a sanctuary is a blessed place for sure... guard it fiercely!! More of those hugz whether you want them or not!!!

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  5. As I was 'trying' to read your post, my dog (1 or 2!) kept crying behind my chair...she wanted up on my lap with the other dog...well, add a laptop and there's not room for me to even type. So, off I just went to the dining room table just to read blogs! I don't have an escape and need one badly...I told hubby I am coming back as a man in my next life. All you do is get up, have breakfast made for you, someone does the cleanup and dishes (each day), then you get to sit in your big, offy chair and watch TV or go on the internet, then you have someone make your dinner and again clean up and do the dishes (each day!!!), while you go off to your comfy chair (AGAIN!) and sit. I take care of dogs, walks, meds, everything. Guess I could have just saie like Leighway above "I know how you feel" but I needed to 'whine' and I didn't even need the cheese!

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  6. What a great road for a dog walk--or any walk!

    I completely understand about needing to get away, even when you can't leave the house. I don't have a specific place to retreat; I have a sewing room, but no comfy chair in there and no room for one. My special retreat time is Sunday mornings when I have breakfast in bed. I get up and get my own breakfast ready--pretty basic: a banana chocolate chip muffin (a special Sunday treat), some fresh fruit and homemade mocha in a tea pot and then I head up to my bedroom. It's not about breakfast, but about relaxing against a mound of pillows in bed and listening to birds and nature sounds on a CD with my current book, maybe some pages of the paper or something else I want to read, and my tablet to watch YouTube, mostly tutorials about art journaling. Sometimes I'm joined by a cat or two and they hang out for awhile and then wander off. If I were any kind of knitter, I'd be knitting up there. It's so relaxing and renewing. I can be up there for hours. I've been doing this for nearly forty years. It's so healing, my personal form of therapy. I think it's saved me at times and I love it. So, good for you for taking the time to unwind and reset your mind. Just think of all the mayhem you've avoided by not murdering someone!

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  7. I’m glad you found your spot. Hopefully, some days the dogs will be settled and you can get a nap in. Hang in there. You have my prayers

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  8. That last two sentences made me laugh out loud. I say Amen Sister!! I love to disappear in my creative space from time to time. Sometimes I even take a day off work to do it and not tell anyone I'm home. Heehee.

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  9. Love the work in progress. The colors are spectacular for a purple lover like me! It will be hard to wait to see the finished poncho!
    Joan from Missouri

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  10. You live in a lovely neighbourhood. I love all the trees you have around (and hopefully you don't get too much leaf drop in the Fall). I completely understand the need for your own space. My husband is a way down the dementia trail (although our medics are calling it Cognitive Impairment) so I understand the need to retreat sometimes. Husband woke me up at 6 o'clock this morning with "Are you going to challenge him?" What the.....? I dragged myself awake for a little chat to make sure he was ok. Garbled conversation followed but it seems he was dreaming, or just confused, and he did go back to sleep. Me? Not so much although I dozed. I make all the decisions, calm his anxiety, do the grocery ordering and bill paying, arrange medical stuff, keep him safe when he's anxious or confused so some space and time for myself and for yourself is essential. There's no room for guilt when you're living for two people. Enjoy your personal space, it's better than murder.

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  11. Great post with which I totally agree! We don't have an extra room to use as a retreat but I have my sewing studio set up nicely, full of colour and I also have plans for my bedroom this year.

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